In the most fundamental assessment of why bullying occurs may lie an inherent need to dominate and be seen as the strongest, the toughest, the best. All around us are examples of people who have proven themselves as such, and yet we have a fascination when it doesn't work also.

Regardless of the why, the fact is that being on the receiving end of bullying is no joke. It doesn't matter whether the bullied individual is a child or an adult (and yes, adults can be bullied as well). The ultimate effects can be devastating, for both the victim and for those who care for them.

As a mother, the worst thing I could have heard from my child was a wish to kill himself, because things were so bad. I felt that I had failed in the basic role of a parent, to protect my child. What had I missed? What could I have done differently? But, as a result, I have met some fantastic people who do care, who have shown me that, for examples, not all school staff turn a blind eye. Hopefully there is light at the end of that dark tunnel.

I hope others can learn from what has happened to me and mine and to those that I know.

Some useful links

Kidscape: This charity is so small and yet the difference that they can make is huge. I heard about them because my sister, who is a Childline counsellor, recommended their ZAP Assertiveness Course for my son. The course is excellent, and there is the opportunity afterwards for both kids and adults to network for mutual support. It can be very lonely being the parent of a bullied child.

They also have a really excellent idea in their Bullying Log. This is a document which can be used with a school as a means of recording incidents of bullying. It means that the evidence base is maintained should further action be required.

ChildLine: Again, an amazing charity, which does a fantastic job. For those kids who need to talk to someone, they will answer. That means even when you are on your way to school, or waiting for a bus.

Dept of Education's guidance (all 64 pages of it) is available to schools to formulate their policies against bullying. It appears to have some uses, including outlining what should happen in a well-structured anti-bullying policy. Click here to go a page on the Anti-Bullying Alliance with even more links